My Lover's Gone
by livingdeadblondegirl
Summary: Disclaimer: I don’t own anything. The song is by Dido and I don’t own that either. Rating: PG? Warnings: Spoilers for S4 as a whole; character death Word Count: 1533 Summary: Tag to Last Man Standing, how did the


My Lover's Gone

Author: Littlebit

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. The song is by Dido and I don't own that either.

Rating: PG?

Warnings: Spoilers for S4 as a whole; character death

Word Count: 1533

Summary: Tag to Last Man Standing, how did the events of the timeline that Sheppard changed impact Jennifer and Ronon before he died?

As CMO of Atlantis, Jennifer didn't get a lot of down time. True, some weeks had been quieter than others, which allowed for some leisure time but it was also time that was spent catching up on things in the infirmary. The little bit of time she had disappeared after Michael had begun his galaxy-wide attack on humans.

Jennifer, as well as all of her staff, worked tirelessly between the infirmary and the off-world refuge camps. Then Jennifer always worked a few more hours in her lab doing research on an antidote for the Hoffan drug. Therefore, she cherished the few hours at night that she was able to take for herself, especially the ones spent it with a certain Satedan.

Despite the tiredness that was rooted all the way down to her bones, Jennifer's body felt relaxed and limber as she lay next to Ronon's naked form. She curled on top of him, her fingers caressing the toned muscles of his abdomen before he captured her fingers in his large hand. "That tickles."

Jennifer couldn't hold back the giggle that bubbled up at his words. "I wonder what everyone on Atlantis, especially the females, would think if they knew how ticklish you were. That one touch could bring down the big warrior."

"Only yours." Ronon said softly as he reached forward and brushed a stray hair out of her face before his forefinger came down to brush her cheek.

Jennifer leaned into the caress and looked into his eyes. They weren't the same eyes that had looked at her so warmly in the infirmary so many months ago when they almost shared their first kiss. She knew that they still looked at her lovingly but always surrounded by the grief that had hit them so hard in the past couple of months. And on that night, there was something more that made Jennifer sit up a little. "Ronon? What's wrong?"

"I'm leaving..." Ronon declared. "I'm leaving Atlantis."

"What?" Jennifer asked, the surprise from his words caused her to leave her relaxed position and sit up, the sheet wrapped around her body. "What do you mean you're leaving?"

"I went to Colonel Carter a few days ago, told her I wanted to go off-world and find other people who want to fight the Wraith. The teams here are too busy with defending the city and helping the sick. We need more fighters out there." Ronon explained as he rose and scooted back against the headboard. "She gave me the go-ahead today."

"But why do you have to leave Atlantis? Why can't you gather the people together and then come back? You could keep coming with me off-world to help…" Jennifer asked, her voice cracking with emotion.

"Jenn, I'm a fighter, not a body-guard." Ronon explained. "That's not how I want to payback Michael for what he's done."

"Atlantis is your home." Jennifer responded weakly.

"No, not anymore." Ronon replied and saw tears coming into Jenn's eyes. He brushed them away with his thumbs before explaining. "With Sheppard gone and Teyla dead, the only thing that has been keeping me here is you. And I love you but I have to do this. It's who I am and I belong on the battlefield."

Which was why Jennifer couldn't argue with him and why she said, "And I belong here, trying to help the uninfected and cure the sick."

Ronon saw the acceptance of his decision in her beautiful brown eyes and knew it was how things had to be. He pulled her the rest of the way up his body until her lips were lined up with his. As always passion flared between them but now also desperation colored their embraces as well.

Jennifer was busy prepping the doctors about to take over the shift so she could go back to her quarters for a much needed shower when Colonel Carter entered the infirmary. As soon as she saw the look on the older woman's face, she knew it was bad news as most news anymore was. The subject was only the only question. She excused herself before approaching her. "What can I do for you, Colonel?"

"I need to speak to you about something. Can we talk in your office?" Sam asked.

"Um, sure." Jennifer stated, the feeling of unease slowly turning into full blown concern over what the Colonel could want to speak to her about that could warrant the privacy of her office. Jennifer nervously played her with her hands as she walked and prayed that it wasn't Ronon.

Once they were inside her office and the door was shut, Sam began. "We just received a report from Ronon's camp. I'm not sure if you were aware of it or not but his group were able to learn the location of one of Michael's hybrid cloning facilities."

"Ronon mentioned it a few days ago when I helped deliver the supplies to his camp." Jennifer declared, thinking of the last trip she had made to see him. After he had established his camp, Ronon had talked Colonel Carter into donating some supplies to it. Nothing huge, just some P90s, explosives and medical supplies. When Sam had mentioned the medical supplies, Jennifer had quickly volunteered to accompany the marines who were delivering them to ensure that there was someone at the camp who would know what all the med supplies were. But it had just been an excuse to see Ronon and it was worth it to spend just a few hours with him.

"After days of reconnaissance, they made their move today." Sam explained. "Ronon led a strike team inside to plant explosives. They were able to breach the perimeter but were discovered and pinned down."

"Were there any injuries?" Jennifer asked as she moved to grab her emergency off-world kit. "I just came off duty but I don't mind going…"

"Ronon's dead, Jennifer." Sam announced quickly. She knew she was being abrupt but she wanted Jennifer to know the full truth of the situation.

Jennifer's head snapped back up to look at the older woman. "What?"

"After they were trapped inside, Ronon sent his team back to the gate. He went on by himself and what his men tell me was a Wraith ally. On his orders they radioed him after reaching the gate. Shortly after, a massive explosion wiped out the facility. They searched the debris and out lying areas but haven't been able to find any trace of Ronon. It looks like he sacrificed himself to ensure that the facility was taken out." Sam finished telling her. "I'm so sorry Jennifer. Ronon was a good man and a talented fighter. I believe he died as he would have wanted, fighting."

Jennifer's eyes burned with tears and her chest felt as if someone had just punched through it and ripped out her heart. Ronon was gone. The strong, fearless Satedan who no one had ever believed would stop fighting was dead. "But it doesn't make the fact that he's still dead hurt less."

"No, it doesn't." Sam replied in understanding. "I just…"

"Colonel…Sam. If you don't mind, I'd like to be alone." Jennifer announced. She saw Sam open her mouth to argue but closed it quickly. "Of course."

Sam moved to leave but stopped just before the door. "Jennifer, please don't hesitate to come and see me if you need someone to talk to."

"Thanks." Jennifer answered not even looking at her. She waited until she knew that Sam was gone before she left via one of the other doors, trying to avoid her staff as she headed for her room. She practically ran there, not caring about the strange looks she encountered along the way.

After she entered the security of her quarters, Jennifer stumbled to her bed and tried to choke back the tears by taking deep breaths. When she laid down her face felt the large fur blanket from Ronon's bed that he had left behind for her. He said it was for her to curl up with until he could come back. That memory was the thing to break her and the tears came. Jennifer lay on her bed, curled up in the blanket and sobbed for her dead lover.

My Lover's Gone

My lover's gone,  
His boots no longer by my door,  
He left at dawn,  
And as I slept I felt him go  
Returns no more,  
I will not watch the ocean,  
My lover's gone,  
No earthly ships will ever bring him home again,  
Bring him home again

My lover's gone,  
I know that kiss will be my last,  
No more his song,  
The tune upon his lips has passed  
I sing alone,  
While I watch the ocean,  
My lover's gone,  
No earthly ships will ever bring him home again,  
Bring him home again


End file.
